One of my goals in life to make my passing an easy event is to own an octopus in the very near future. Also, another one of my new favorite words is “betentacled”. Like a fancy hybrid of “bespectacled” or “bedazzled” but cephalopod-ified. I’m down with that. Check out this offering from Discovery.com about a robot octopus that swims at warp speeds. As Ze Frank refers to my eight-armed subject of adoration, the “floppy floppy spider of the sea” isn’t exactly notorious for being a speedy little guy or anything, but this “roboctopus” (love that) is capable of crawling and carrying things across the Aegean Sea. It’s flexible silicone arms enable it to move at a speed of 100 millimeters per second. I haven’t timed my swimming capabilities lately, but I’m pretty sure I could still catch it! Researchers in the video point out that this guy has drawn quite the school of fans, following him around on his excursions. This allows the fish to tag along with a creature that normally would make them a meal. Sigh. I still want the real thing.